Fanila Fantasy - The Case of Omar Effendi

Dusty

As Egypt's political soap opera lingers on, a recent decision of an economic administrative court carries potentially far more lasting consequences to the lives of ordinary Egyptians. The affirmation of the annulment of the privatization of Omar Effendi -- a heavily indebted, overstaffed and low-quality department store chain sold to a Gulf investor in 2006 -- sends out a troubling signal to the market over the direction of Egyptian economic policy making.

Deeply flawed on procedural and substantive grounds, the Omar Effendi case has became a rallying point for the retrograde revolutionary activists promising a return of the Egyptian economy to its illusory socialist hey-day. The fact the all-powerful rulers allowed for this decision to be rendered is revealing of their control-and-command mentality, the same mentality that set the country so far back for sixty years. A security-first instinct mixing with interventionist populism is unwinding the tepid market-based reforms undertaken in Egypt over the last decade, further setting back the cause of reform.

Egyptians cannot afford more of these delusions, no matter the excuses and no matter how many stop-gap grants the country bribes out of the world. There are no shortcuts to market reforms; the longer Egypt waits, the harder they will be to implement.  

Another Message from The Hand

In the name of the most merciful who has bestowed upon you the ever-presence of The Hand:

Since we last communicated there have been certain notable developments in the country, so The Hand has deemed it appropriate to provide all you lesser beings with a brief assessment from The Hand's omnipotent vantage point at Minipax:

1. Mass showings of solidarity in the streets have been suitable, but next time there will be less tolerance for those grumbling of missed beach time.
2. Undulations to The Hand's greatness need improvement. Still lacking a uniquely catchy tune. Brava to Ghada El Sherif; this is the kind of incisive coverage The Hand is looking for. 
3. To you die-hard supporters of the deposed, stop being so stubborn. The Hand can and will out-God and out-gun you, but really, what are we fighting for? You know and The Hand knows that the so-called "liberal" wussies have been rendered impotent by their fickleness and fear. Get back to your core competency of controlling culture, knowing, naturally, that the rest is for The Hand, and only The Hand, to handle.
4. To you Christian people, just a gentle reminder less you get too carried away...
5. Finally, to you Mr. Obama, اتنيل بنيلة. Of course, that means The Hand is fully committed to a democratic transition, respectful of tolerance and universal human rights, et cetera et cetera. Funding and our strategic partnership will be keenly protected. See you soon at Tysons.

No irony

So Long to Flower Power

The time that never was

Egypt's sixties moment is over. In yet another sign of how it all went so wrong, the same "revolutionary" minions who recklessly promised the moon to Egyptians back in those heady days of Tahrir circa January 2011, are now whole-heartedly supporting the strike back of the empire in its most unfettered and vicious form. Insipid war songs, feigning praises for the military command, over-hyped nationalism and even more over-charged xenophobia not only are now commonplace, but are encouraged by the headless "political forces" and their phantom liberal backers. Egyptians have been misled into incongruously subscribing to a belief of having their interests aligned with self-interested generals, then pinning hopes on dyed-and-stained Islamist retrogrades, then back again, all the while desperately seeking for anything other than total chaos. Whether this ends in a full-fledged military takeover or not is beside the point -- Egypt already is a military state. And sadly, this may not be the worst option any longer for a country where religious tyrants have been let loose, yes moderated by short-term opportunism, but always wedded to a fundamentally anti-modern set of ideals.

Ahly, Zamalek, Boredom

A faintly familiar game played in Gouna

Unsatisfied with domineering political life, centralizing the economy and  straight jacketing religious and social norms, the vampires have sunk their teeth deeper into one of the last bastions of free expression in Egypt, the rivalry between Zamalek and Ahly. The African Champions League match-up between the two (no local competition face offs being any longer possible, thanks to the idiotic decision to cancel the league and cup) was played in circumstances that can be charitably described as intentionally horrendous. Unpaid players who have not faced a competitive match in months were commandeered to run around in broiling temperatures at a wind swept field on the Red Sea in the middle of the fasting month of Ramadan. 

The game itself was a predictably terrible stalemate, lacking in every facet. The only people leaving happy were the authorities congratulating themselves for the wondrous achievement of staging a football match for ninety minutes, complete with twenty-two players in neat uniforms and even some fans with waving flags who braved the uncertainty of whether they would be allowed to attend.

Another victory for dulling unity, another loss for Egypt. 

Oh my...

CC Set to Dominate

Last line says it all.

No use denyin' it

Egypt's Unfantastic Economic Policy

Dr. Doom looms

Based on early indications, the vision of the economic "Fantastic Four" in Egypt's new cabinet is no better than that of predecessor governments. Their priorities lie squarely on finding scotch-taped solutions to an economy that instead requires radical structural change. 

Subsidizing bread instead of flour (inviting further state intrusions), centralized targeting of commodity levels (might work in the military, does not work in a market economy), seeking out billions in aid and concessionary loans to finance an unsustainable and distorted fuel market (which will not be made any more sustainable by cracking down on smuggling), setting a national minimum wage (which won't be enforced and anyway fails to address chronic unemployment and underemployment) and promising to support domestic industry by simply providing better physical security (as opposed to a streamlined bureaucracy, functioning infrastructure and non-corrupted legal and business environment), will not cut it. The politicized decision to put the IMF loan package on the back burner furthers the sense that this government has no real economic agenda. 

Merely not being the Muslim Brotherhood is not an economic policy. Fantastic and revolutionary this is not.  

CC Blows

The Yankees' lefty that is, not the all-omnipotent one.

Coptic Quota

Symbolic harmony

New cabinet announced. All-important Ministers of Environment and Scientific Research again Copts (plus consolation prize of the weakest of the economic ministries). 

A Message from The Hand

In the name of the most merciful whatever you happen to believe in, provided, in primus, such belief neither conflicts with nor otherwise diminishes the superiority of The Hand:

We hail your perseverance in crushing the vast conspiracy of the American-Zionist enemy against our great nation. We hail the return of the "real Egypt" to which we devote ourselves; the Egypt of staged democratic stability, privileged economic dynamism and comfortably hypocritical cultural conformity; the Egypt where The Hand always is slapping on your golden faces.

To the disappointed believers of the fascist regime of the past, in the spirit of togetherness and forgiveness The Hand offers you the unfettered ability to spread your religious bigotry, without, of course, upsetting the "civic nature" of the loving state. To our once excited, then frightened, and now again excited "revolutionaries", we hereby promise to maintain the veneer of independent media and to keep open at all times at least one of Tamerai and La Bodega, so as to provide you with the calming illusion of living in a progressive country, subject only to occasional closures or threats of closure to remind of the superiority of The Hand. To our Christian brothers and sisters, The Hand offers you a happy life wherein your existence will be tolerated, with only the minor inconveniences that will necessarily arise from time to time to underline the presence of The Hand. And to the rest of the blessed proles of this wonderful land, The Hand offers you the privilege of subsistence amounts of water, electricity, diesel and bread, with the gentle reminder that such privileges can and will be revoked when and where The Hand, in its eternal wisdom, deems necessary.

Now what to do with Egypt?

No love

After seeing one of its purported headline foreign policy achievements implode and instead become a lightening rod for criticisms that go far and wide (very far, and very wide in the case of conspiracy-loving Egyptians), the Administration may be tempted to simply give up on Egypt. That temptation must be resisted. The United States has massive influence in, and must stay engaged with, Egypt. In doing so, it should be guided by a few insurmountable principles that are too often overlooked:

SHAME ON EGYPT

From a symbol of hope and joy...

Obama's Egypt Disaster

Strained alliance

The Obama Administration did not cause the mess in Egypt over the past two and a half years, but it has nonetheless made a mess out of U.S. policy in the country. Born out of an ill-considered gamble on populist foreign policy, followed by a fateful approach to retrograde Islamists, then ultimately damned by an unimaginative, tepid and defeatist positioning of American influence in the region, the Administration has failed miserably. While U.S. perseverance may have helped Egypt's hopelessly inept leaders avoid a total train-wreck, Obama never should have supported the "revolution" (speaking of coups...) against Mubarak in the first instance, and never should have aligned the United States with political Islam. Once the Administration did do these things, however, it managed to make matters insurmountably worse by not using U.S. influence to drive the fundamental change that Egypt desperately needs to its body politic, economy and society at large.  

Coup-é

Let's just focus on the "e"

Egypt's Failed Revolution(s)

It was not a revolution in 2011.  It was not a revolution in 2012. And it is not a revolution now. Egypt -- all of it -- has failed.

Dummies

Egyptian Monopoly Continued

With Saudi Arabia, the United Arab Emirates and others lined up to flood a post-Brotherhood Egypt with billions of dollars (that will never be repaid), substituting for the billions of Brotherhood-era dollars from Qatar, Turkey and Libya (that will never be repaid), plus the billions of U.S., European and international funds that continue to roll in whomever is in power (that too will never be repaid), perhaps Egypt is on to something. Every couple of years scare the world shitless with mass mayhem, then sit back and add up the mula. 

Revolutionary Pounds

Egypt in a Global Perspective

The world's view of Egypt according to Egyptians:

• "Tens of millions of peaceful citizens on streets bravely championing a democratic revolution over scary bearded people" 

• "White House, European Commission, Qatar scheming 23 hours per day on grand strategies in Egypt; all other foreign and domestic policy issues deemed irrelevant"

• "Every man, woman and child over the age of three passionately following latest conspiracy intrigue offered by Tawfiq Okasha"

And in other news, tragic death of firefighters in historic heat in Arizona, revelations of mass wiretapping continue, commodity prices in state of collapse, Brazil crush Spain in World Cup warm up, Mika to judge Italian version of X-Factor 

Religion can inspire...

Red Card: Zamalek is too big for you

Off you go

It started off as a bad joke back in 2011 when the Muslim Brotherhood suggested it would field a sporting club to bring its pious practices to national sporting competition. Apparently, they were not kidding, but instead of taking on Zamalek and Ahly, they have decided to simply take them over. The bearded ones have announced that they will contest in Zamalek's upcoming board elections, risking putting Egypt's greatest club at the mercy of political zealots. 

Morsi and company have tested the country's patience with a year's worth of utter incompetence, with everything from polarizing politics and yo-yo economic declarations to televising live their spy fiction diplomacy, making stone age cultural pronouncements and appointing terrorists as governors in the country's key tourist zones. They have managed to float by thanks to an equally, if not even more, incompetent opposition, which has conspired with the Brotherhood to destroy any semblance of a functioning state. 

The Sewage Canal

As Egypt frets that Ethiopian hydroelectric designs may force a rethink of its asinine aspirations to flood infertile sands to grow rice and wheat to replace asphalted-over Nile river plains (and impinge upon time-honored traditions such as aimlessly watering the street), attention has shifted away from development plans for the country's other strategic waterway, the Suez Canal. The Suez Canal Corridor Project seeks to promote public-private partnerships to develop the areas adjacent to the 160 kilometer long canal. With the exception of the harbors, liquefied natural gas container facilities and some light industry in Soukna and East Port Said, the canal area is sparsely developed. Utilizing a strategic location, which is the main trading conduit between Asia and Europe and through which $1.6 trillion in global goods flow annually, for more than collecting a relatively meager $5 billion in annual tolls would seem uncontroversial. Not so in Egypt.

Wasted gifts

Setting aside the mundane reject-at-all-costs arguments to anything and everything proposed by the government, the most substantive criticism has centered on long term land leases that would be granted to private investors. The opposition has offered nothing in terms of economic alternatives to how Egypt can develop the Suez Canal area -- or anywhere else in the country, for that matter -- without private investment, for which certainty of property rights is a must. Instead, sewer-politics has dominated, with stump speeches recklessly appealing to the country's toxic mix of xenophobic paranoia and delusive socialist dreams. 

Neatly summing up the opposition's incapacity on both the Nile and Suez Canal, one of its leading lights, hot-heated Hamdin Sabahi, has a be-damned proposal to block passage along the Suez Canal to all countries with contractors working on the Ethiopia project.  This would ensure that Egypt becomes an international pariah, and a poorer and drier one at that. Meanwhile, Morsi and his brethren have decided to shift focus entirely and sow the seeds of inter-religious strife in Syria, a conflict in which Egypt has no business in, let alone capacity for, injecting itself.  

Wheat Dreams

Food security

The topic of the day raging among the talking pinheads in Egypt is the total output of this year's domestic wheat crop. The nine o-clock news on state television started off with a full twenty minute segment on the issue. A smiling president stood in the midst of waving wheat fields confidently forecasting self-sufficiency. Predictably, the pro-Morsi crowd is pointing to optimistic measurements of record output, whereas the Morsi detractors claim the numbers are exaggerated and hearken to even more fantastic production levels that could be reached but for presidential mismanagement.  Both sides are missing the point: Egypt should not be targeting self-sufficiency in cereals.  

You can't take Egypt out of the Egyptian

Egypt appears a changing place. Beards are growing bushier, head coverings are becoming longer, language is becoming more Arabized, politics are becoming more politicized. There is a niggling sense of uncertainty that unsettles many, if not most, of an ever-stressed population that is tested on everything from their religious beliefs to crossing the street.  Many -- far too many -- have been driven out of the country altogether, whether out of economic desperation, a random judicial system or otherwise.

But through it all, Egyptians have been, are, and will remain, Egyptians. No matter how large the standard zebiba, or stern the airport official or shrill the street demonstration, Egypt will get through it, because Egypt is embedded deep into the hearts, minds and souls of Egyptians anywhere and everywhere. Rational or irrational, it an unshakable truism underpinning Egyptian society. 

You can take the Egyptian out of Egypt, but you can never take Egypt out of the Egyptian. 

Dayman

Intolerable Religion in Egypt

It's pretty pathetic when Russia, a country steeped in a modern history seeking the obliteration of religion, does a better job promoting Christian-Muslim harmony than Egypt, a nation with an ever-fading pride as a bastion of monotheistic learning and tolerance.

Learn from the comrades

Kill Twitter

Twitter might be a convenient platform for passing along quick thoughts or building up one's vanity, as the case may be. It is not the appropriate way to run U.S. foreign policy. The Obama twits need to grow up.

From the Monroe Doctrine to 140 characters or less