On occasion of the overwhelming approval of the new constitutional “road map” returning Egypt to its real, democratic and modern self, Real Egypt reporter Mohamed Ahmed journeyed to interview Fake Egypt electrician Ahmed Mohamed.
MA: I apologize for the three hour delay in arriving. Traffic in Fake Egypt is horrendous, and I had to triple-park my car on the sidewalk. We never encounter such things in Real Egypt. Well, actually that is not entirely true, we do experience such problems in Real Egypt too. Come to think of it, this street looks quite familiar...we digress, let's get to it.
AM: 3ady.
MA: Tell me about the situation now in Fake Egypt.
AM: Conditions are not the best. It’s hard to find stable work. I have to pay private tutors to educate all of my children, since they learn nothing at school. Garbage rarely is collected on our dusty and overcrowded street. Bread and gas are relatively cheap, but not always available and of highly variable quality. Tap water comes in various different shades.
MA: Sounds pretty bad. Is your government not assisting you?
AM: No, and what little they do ultimately comes after mass protest and under-the-table payments. They do, however, occasionally paint the street curbs.
MA: Did you vote in the latest referendum?
AM: I would prefer not to answer questions about politics, because if I give the wrong answer, I risk being deemed a foreign conspirator.
MA: I apologize for the three hour delay in arriving. Traffic in Fake Egypt is horrendous, and I had to triple-park my car on the sidewalk. We never encounter such things in Real Egypt. Well, actually that is not entirely true, we do experience such problems in Real Egypt too. Come to think of it, this street looks quite familiar...we digress, let's get to it.
AM: 3ady.
MA: Tell me about the situation now in Fake Egypt.
AM: Conditions are not the best. It’s hard to find stable work. I have to pay private tutors to educate all of my children, since they learn nothing at school. Garbage rarely is collected on our dusty and overcrowded street. Bread and gas are relatively cheap, but not always available and of highly variable quality. Tap water comes in various different shades.
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| Electric shop in Fake Egypt |
MA: Sounds pretty bad. Is your government not assisting you?
AM: No, and what little they do ultimately comes after mass protest and under-the-table payments. They do, however, occasionally paint the street curbs.
MA: Did you vote in the latest referendum?
AM: I would prefer not to answer questions about politics, because if I give the wrong answer, I risk being deemed a foreign conspirator.
