BREAKING NEWS - Alex Ferguson confirmed as new coach of Ahly. Citing club insiders, Sir Alex was quoted as being excited of the opportunity to coach "batal el qarn" in its ambition to win the league title.
UPDATED - Ahly officials have corrected a story released twelve seconds ago. "Sir Alex" should read "El Badry Basha" and the "ambition to win the league title" should read "hope to finish ahead of Wadi Degla".
UPDATE 2 - Following news of El Badry Basha turning down the offer, Homer Simpson has emerged as a front runner to coach "batal el qarn." Asked to comment on the news report, Homer -- whose name sounded out in Arabic is suitably close to the pejorative "donkey" -- stated if he takes over, Hossam Ghaly will be moved into a more attacking midfield role and Sherif Ekramy will be replaced by Barney.