Informed security sources have spotted an armed, little green man in various gatherings across Cairo. He is reported to have entered Egyptian soil from the Rafah border crossing carrying either an Israeli, U.S., Qatari or Turkish passport, or possibly a combination of all four, and is considered a mortal risk to the integrity of the state and unity of Egyptians. Military and police units have been instructed to use live fire to attack the little green man and any and all whom are suspected of being his supporters.
Terrified local butcher Ahmed El Gazzar, who saw the little green man in front of his shop at the perimeter of El Rabaa El Adawaya Square, overhead him to say that he is "angry, very angry indeed". Concerned citizens are asked to refrain from wearing green-colored clothing, and to contact their local television station in a state of hysteria pleading for security at all costs.